My Life, My Lover, My Soul
by Haley Cullen
Summary: BELLA POV: A week after their engagement, Jacob left, and a night alone. Edward and Bella are no longer able to wait until after the wedding. I suck at summaries, Warning: Lemons, Lemons, Lemons!


**I know this is a stretch for me because I don't usually write lemons, but I couldn't resist. I am usually the kind of person who enjoys the romantic side of lemons and not just the heated side so I tried my best with this story. But I must warn you, STILL VERY LEMONY! BEWARE LEMONADE! But it is very emotional if you want to give it a try. Sweet, sentimental, romantic, and HOT! This is my second lemon and I don't know if this will be my last or not. I still have other unfinished stories to work on. I hope to get them finished as soon as possible as soon as I am finished with loaded school work. Well, if you have the heart to read my story, LEAVE A REVIEW!! Hope you like it!**

**Disclaimer: Twilight characters are NOT MINE! I shouldn't even have to tell you that, really.**

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My Life…My Lover…My Soul

By: Haley Cullen

It had been a week since the newborn attack, since Jacob left, since my engagement to Edward. I knew that deep inside, Jacob wasn't coming back. But as long as I had Edward with me I could get through anything. The Cullen family had gone out hunting for a weekend. Edward and I had decided to take advantage of the empty house and spend a few days together alone. God, after all of the anxiety from the past few days, this was a dream come true. So that was where I was now, sleeping in his, no _our_, bed while he would comfortably read a book by my side, patiently waiting for me to wake up; At least at most times.

I was woken up by the feel of hard, cold lips at the base of my throat. My eyes snapped open with a start. Edward's lips explored over the length of my neck and my upper chest. "Edward," I gasped, catching my breath when I felt his tongue trace the contour of my collarbone.

"Mmm?" he mumbled. It took every bit of energy I had to form a coherent sentence, "Edward, what are you doing?"

I felt him smile against my skin. "I'm sorry, love," he said in his velvet voice, "I just couldn't keep my lips off of you, you are so beautiful."

His lips parted as they traveled to my ear. He licked around the shell of my ear before bringing my earlobe in to suck. I was gasping for desperately needed air and trembling violently. My head didn't seem to be able to create coherent thoughts. They were all jumbled up, '_Edward… God… Can't be happening_.'

"What happened?" I stuttered out. He seemed to know what I meant when he sat back up to look deeply into my brown eyes. "I'm tired of waiting, Bella. I can't stay away from you any longer. I love you, I want you. I want you to have every part of me, and god only knows how much I want of you, too," he murmured sincerely. Then his head dropped to kiss my neck, "To kiss you, to touch you, to feel you, to taste you," he muttered as his mouth traced a line over my jaw before hovering over my lips.

"Edward," I gasped. I had tried so hard in the past few days to try and keep control of myself. But the inevitable truth was that neither of us could wait anymore. It was impossible. If there was no release soon, we would both combust.

I moaned loudly and, without thinking, bucked my hips. I was starting to feel wet and a slow throbbing pulse began to make itself known to me deep within my core. I knew he could smell it.

I grinded myself against his hips; and I felt his excitement as well. Something in the back of my mind told me that what we were doing was wrong and that we shouldn't be doing anything like this just 

yet. But as one of his hands dropped down to rub sensuously over my inner thigh, my self-control flew out the window.

Edward groaned in pleasure and rubbed his erection against me through our clothes. He was wearing a loose pair of denim jeans while I only wore a thin layer of pajama shorts. I couldn't stop the growls of pleasure that seemed to radiate from both of us as our movements started to increase in pace. Until now, the only light available was the limited amount coming from the small alarm clock on the nightstand. Edward lifted his head and with a smirk reached across me and unplugged it. We were suddenly plunged into darkness.

I gasped at his abruptness, not able to make out anything in the dark. But that didn't matter, because the only thing I could focus on was the fact that he was touching me. I was fully aware when his fingers started to play around the rim to my pajama bottoms. I moaned at the small caress. "Bella?" he asked mischievously. I could only grunt in response. Edward leaned down and breathed his sweet breath onto my face, "Are you a large fan of foreplay?" he asked casually.

I was really too far into sensation to be embarrassed. "No," I got out.

He smiled, flashing his teeth, "Good. Neither am I." And before I knew what had happened, my clothes were off of my body and his too. I gasped in shock. I felt his lips travel down my neck again and I couldn't move. I moaned with every breath. My nipples stood out, pointed and alert.

When his lips travelled over my neck and over my chest, my breath caught in my throat. "You're so beautiful," he breathed. I felt him smile as his lips parted and his mouth traveled down one breast to my nipple. His tongue flicked out and he licked it fully. I cried out in response. This seemed to encourage him and he wrapped his lips around it, sucking hard.

My head tossed and turned from side to side. His fingers drifted over my stomach and down between my legs. I deftly cursed at how fast he moved, too eager. My breathing stopped as he slid one finger inside of me, spreading my wetness around.

I was gasping frantic breaths now. He slowly pulled his finger back out. He held it close to his face to examine my juices. Then, so quickly I wondered if I had really seen it, he popped his finger into his mouth to taste it. I was about to ask when I felt his fingers back at the entrance to my pussy.

His fingertips circled the rim, teasing me. "Edward!" I pleaded. Then his fingers, three of them at once, were inside me. They moved in and out at a rapid pace. I screamed in utter elation. It felt so good.

His free hand grabbed my wrists and pinned them above my head. I couldn't stop my harsh breathing as his fingers moved, bringing me to my first orgasm. I couldn't stop myself as I kissed him. I kissed him deeper than I ever had before. And to my thrill, he did not retreat.

My mouth was latched to his as the last of my waves of pleasure washed over me. "Edward!" I groaned.

He kissed underneath my jaw and nuzzled my neck."Sometimes I wonder how someone as perfect as you could ever love a horrid monster like me," he said quietly, it sounded as though he was talking to himself.

My hands gently took his face and I pulled him up to look me in the eyes. I looked at him seriously, making sure he was listening. "Edward," I said, "You are not a monster. And even if you were, which you're not, I would still love you." He stared at me incredulously. I smiled kindly at him and placed a quick kiss on his lips, whispering words of devotion. "My life…My best friend…My existence…My lover…My heart…My soul…Me," I whispered in-between kisses.

He cradled my face in one hand and kissed me fully with emotion pouring from the way his lips moved. I could have sworn I felt his lip quiver as my hands, fearlessly, traced his faultless features.

"Uhhh, Bella," he whimpered. Then before I could comprehend what had happened, he was gone. I took in a sharp intake of breath from surprise and felt around the darkness. I lifted my head up from the pillows and saw him. I had not realized that the moonlight was shining through the large window. It slanted across the floor and over the large bed, leaving a silver-blue light washed around us.

Edward sat little more than a foot from me. He had his legs folded under him, propped up slightly on the heels of his feet. There wasn't enough light to see his features, but I could clearly make out his dark silhouette. Like a figure made of night, the image of perfection, waiting for me.

I saw him lift a finger and he beckoned for me to come to him. He gently grabbed my wrists and carefully placed me in his lap; I straddled him, my knees on either side of his still-folded legs. The only feature I could make out in the darkness was his eyes. They shined a bright golden in the silver light. They burned with intensity, excitement, sensuality, carefulness, but most of all, love.

We gazed deeply into each other's eyes as he pulled me closer to him. His erection burned cold against my stomach. I encircled my arms around his neck while he placed each of his hands behind me, one on my lower back and the other between my shoulder blades.

He slowly leaned forward and brought his lips to mine. I moaned under his touch. The kiss itself was long and slow. He took careful time to explore the cavern of my mouth. Every few moments or so, one of us would groan in torture, our bodies begging for release.

Finally he pulled away. He stared into my eyes with such a passion; I thought I would come right then and there. He placed his forehead against mine and placed one, two, three small kisses on my cheek. His touches were so tender. His body was so ice cold and rock hard, yet it was somehow warm and soft at the same time.

"Bella," he whispered his voice heavy and ragged, "are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yes, Edward," I said back, smiling, "I want you, _all_ of you. You won't hurt me. If I do feel hurt, I promise to let you know."

He smiled, satisfied, and gently grabbed my hips. He lifted me up ever so slowly until I was hovering over his swollen member. He held me there as he kissed me again. His tongue plunged into my mouth in a steady rhythm. Cautiously, he began to lower me down until the apex of his cock was gently pressed against my clit. I moaned when he grinded forward, rubbing himself against one of my most sensitive areas.

My legs desperately tried to clamp down, but the rest of his body blocked me. He continued to grind against me as soon as he heard my small whimpers of pleasure. He began to increase the pressure and tempo, making me cry out into the darkness.

My hands knotted themselves into his hair. I tugged on his bronze locks desperately, the pleasure was too great. I thought for a moment about making him stop, but I knew that I would combust if he ever did such a thing.

He never relented his pace, ignoring my desperate pleas for him to give in. Finally, I could take no more. I reached down with both hands and squeezed his penis, hard. I heard his sharp intake of breath as I slowly pumped him in a circuit. My hand stilled and I heard him hiss in disapproval. I wished I could see his face, to see his expression. His eyes were now tightly closed, hanging onto the pleasure I was giving him. I could not see in the darkness, therefore I could not fully make out just how big he was. He was large and thick and reached up just past his belly button. For a moment all I could do was worry about how much pain that would cause me.

I gradually led his member to my small entrance. I leaned over and placed kisses all over his face. He was rigid with the tension that he received from me and could only pull my hips closer, my breasts pressed against his chest. I placed chaste kisses on his cheeks, his nose, his forehead, his eyelids, his chin, and then I finally reached his lips. He kissed me hungrily as he suddenly pulled my hips down; my folds opening and engulfing his cock.

I gasped when I felt a fast, sharp pain rip inside my core. I twisted in his grip, uncomfortable with the sudden change in feeling that my body had taken. But Edward only moaned in pleasure. I may have been going through the pain, but he was in heaven. I knew it took all his strength not to plunge into me like I knew he wanted to.

His teeth were clenched and his eyes snapped open. His eyes met mine and we held each other's gaze. The pain was already beginning to fade and I was beginning to feel an immense pleasure begin to ripple up my body.

He kissed me under my jaw and never broke eye contact. "Are you… alright?" he gasped out in profound breaths. I answered by circling my hips, rubbing him against my inner walls. He gasped and was not able to control himself any longer.

He slowly pulled back out until only the tip was left inside. There was still a small stinging sensation, but nothing like the pain before, this being overpowered by the vast pleasure Edward was giving me.

And then he thrust back in, still holding my eyes. His teeth clenched as he fully entered me. I couldn't stop the moan that escaped my lips as his member was buried to the hilt. He replaced one hand between my shoulder blades while the other stayed at my hip, lifting me up and down in a steady rhythm.

He progressively brought me back up and pulled me down against him again. This time neither of us could stop the groans as he was once again sheathed inside me. He gulped and began to increase the pace. He would only pull back an inch or two before bringing me back down, where he would also thrust inward to fully bury himself.

I screamed in ecstasy as I tugged on his bronze strands of hair. His pace was ever growing and unrelenting. He would make one of his rumbling grunts every time our bodies met in a frenzy of friction. We were breathing heavily; I could barely get a breath in while he constantly forced himself inside.

He made one powerful thrust and hit my sweet spot. I cried out louder than I ever had before. All of his motion stilled for only a second or two before he eased his pelvis back and slammed against the same spot again, using more force. I screamed even louder. He brought his lips to my ear, "Does that feel good?" he breathed. I whimpered and tried to get him to move, but he was stock still.

He suddenly growled, low and husky. His voice was an octave lower than normal and he squeezed my hip. "Beg," he commanded.

I cried out again, but he still wouldn't move. His tongue traced my earlobe as he whispered, "I said _beg_, Bella."

My breath was coming in tortured gasps. "Edward, please!"

"What was that?" he asked, "Do you want something, Bella? I know you do, but you need to tell me."

I was too frustrated with him to answer properly, "God Edward, I need you! Please, I need you to be inside me! _Please_!"

He took in a deep breath and started his tempo again, going faster than ever. He reached down and used one cold thumb, starting to rub hard circles on my clit. I was in rapture. My hands tugged on his hair hard though it didn't hurt him. My mouth connected with his. Our tongues passionately danced together, matching the rhythm of his thrusts.

"Bella," he gasped, not quite able to speak, "Bella, I—Fuck…" His head fell to rest in the crook of my neck as he continued to move in and out of me. My warm, wet pussy sucked on his hard cock. His cursing caught me off guard, but it only spurred me forward. I whimpered; I was getting close.

"Shit, Bella," he said again, "You're so tight. It feels so good!" His cool breath breathed onto my neck and I shivered. My head dropped down until my forehead rested on his shoulder. I bit the 

impenetrable skin, trying to hold back my screams of bliss. His thumb pressed even harder against my clit.

I was so close, almost there. But my body refused to comply. I just couldn't seem to get there. All of the muscles in my lower stomach were tense and tight and throbbing, no longer able to intensify higher than they already were. The incredible pleasure was quickly turning into opulent torture. I was right on the edge but could not reach my greatly-needed release.

I whimpered in frustration. Edward's cock pulsed inside of me. The throbbing telling me that he was on that edge as well. And like me, unable to pass it. He pulled me as close as possible and I heard his growl of aggravation. His head lifted from my neck and his forehead was placed on mine.

His teeth were clenched and his muscles apprehensive. We made eye contact and I was sure that we could easily read the other's desperation. I made a quiet sobbing noise in irritation.

Edward raised both of his hands and placed them each on my breasts. I screamed as they began to knead the supple skin. With his hands no longer able to guide me, I braced myself with both hands on his shoulders and started to thrust myself onto his penis. Edward hissed at the sensation and squeezed my breasts.

"Ahhh, _Edward_!" I cried. I was almost there. Edward leaned into me until his mouth was at my ear again, "Bella, I'm so close. God… Please cum for me!"

My face scrunched up to suppress the screams of ecstasy that threatened to break from my lips. I squeezed his shoulders as I brought myself down harder. "Here it comes," he breathed into my ear.

"Ahh, Edward, I'm cumming!" I screamed into the darkness.

"Uh, I can't hold back, Bella!" he yelled after me.

I breathed gruffly as my orgasm finally hit me. I cried louder than any other time that night. The squeezing of the inner walls of my pussy brought Edward to his orgasm as well. "Uhhhhnnn…" he groaned loudly as he came, trying to hold back his cries by biting his lower lip. My walls squeezed him over and over, gently milking him of his pleasure. I was almost surprised when there was no fluid, but I knew it wasn't possible for there to be any.

We embraced each other as we finally reached our high. We came crashing down from the edge and I was left gasping for breath. Edward pushed me down onto my back where he collapsed, his head in the crook of my neck. My entire body trembled and I felt lightheaded. I ran my fingers, gentle now, through Edward's hair as he worked to control his ragged breathing. His erection began to soften inside of me before he pulled out, signaling that it was over.

After a few minutes, Edward lifted his head, his face close to mine. We both smiled at each other. His hands rubbed up and down my sides and over my stomach lovingly. "That was," he said contentedly, "_indescribable_."

I reached my head up and gave him a deep kiss, "Yes, it was."

He smiled the happiest smile I had ever seen on his face. We reached down and smothered my lips with small kisses. "I…love…you…so…much," he whispered in-between kisses.

He flipped us over so that I was lying fully on top of him, my body between his legs and my head resting on his chest. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close. He buried his face into my hair and inhaled, sighing joyfully. My eyelids began to droop. "Sleep now, my Bella," he whispered into my ear.

"But I don't want to sleep," I groaned out tiredly.

He chuckled and nuzzled the crown of my head, "Sleep, love. You are my very existence. I love you and I will never leave you again. Sleep my one and only love." Then he began to sweetly hum my lullaby.

I couldn't fight him when he used his secret weapon. My eyes drooped and closed. "I love you," I whispered before sleep finally took me.

**The End**

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